Monday, May 01, 2006

This just in...

I dislike the Yankees. Go Wakefield.

2) Since everyone else in the world is writing about this, I guess I might as well address the issue: we should boo Damon because he is a douchebag. Now I know what you are think: "But Fletcher, you are saying the guy who helped win the World Series in 2004 and had four fantastic seasons wearing the Red Sox uniform has become a douchebag just because the front office didn't try to pursue him and so he took the huge over-payment the Yanks offered him?" No, quite the opposite, actually; he isn't a douchebag because of the past offseason, but rather he has been one all along. For confirmation of this, flip to any random page in the self-promoting piece of tripe that passes off as his autobiography. He brags about his infidelity, and obviously has the intelligence of a toadstool. A retarded toadstool. A retarded toadstool that passes its time by huffing ether. So boo Damon for being a douchebag.

3) For the record, even though Coco's injured, I still think the Sox made out better than the Yanks in the CF derby. I'll take the younger, cheaper, faster player with an identical OPS to the older, douchier player who spent the past 4 years in a hitters park. I feel confident that 2009 will prove this.

4) I am heading into my exam period, with my first final on Thursday, and my last final on Thursday (the next one). As such, I am already to the point where I am spouting incoherent babble randomly and without reason. Fantastic.

5) When in doubt: always put on your underwear before you put on your pants.

6) Exceptions to point 5: when you are doing a revivalist play of A Clockwork Orange.

7) I think Bill Bilicheck is expecting Tedy Bruschi and Mike Vrabel to play until they are 50 years old. But our offense should be pretty bad ass.

1 Comments:

At 10:23 AM, May 01, 2006, Anonymous Steady B said...

So you are saying that Damon was a douche bag while he was with the redsox?

 

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